Why do noses run and feet smell?

English can be a real puzzle and some say that it is very difficult for young people to understand. Why, for example, does quicksand work slowly? Why is a boxing ring square? How come a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig? Who was it decided that we should have noses that run and feet that smell? How is it that a slim chance and a fat chance appear to be the same thing while a wise man and a wise guy are different things entirely?

Hamburgers have no ham in them and eggplants have no eggs. There is neither pine nor apple in pineapple.

Writers write so why don't grocers groce or hammers ham? If vegetarians eat vegetables what do humanitarians order off the menu?

Also, if you get one goose and add another you have two geese. So why is it that you get one moose and add another you don't have two meese. Like is the plural of tooth is teeth but more than one polling booth is not a bunch of beeth.

In what sort of language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?

If teachers taught, why haven't preachers praught? It hardly seems fare or even fair.

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all of them but one, what is left - an odd or an end?

What sort of world do we live in when your house can go up in flames as it burns down, in which you fill in a form when filling it out and when an alarm goes off by going on?

If you are an invalid it does not make you invalid. If a rubbish tip is full, does it have to refuse refuse? How come that flammable and inflammable mean the same thing? The opposite is actually non-flammable.

Why does a farm produce produce? Why is a bandage wound around a wound?

The bottom line is that if you are young and struggling to understand English it is because it is all as clear as mud!